Slumber Party Massacre 2
Don't Let Go
Run Time: 75 minutes
Production Company: A.I.M.
Director: Deborah Brock
Starring: Crystal Bernard, Juliette Cummins, Patrick Lowe, and Atanas Ilitch as "The Driller Killer"
T & A: Hell No
That's No Cowboy: That's Abdullah the Butcher
It is an old Hollywood adage that sequels are rarely if ever the equal of the originals on which they are based (The second installment of the Godfather series is a good example of one of the few that have accomplished this feat). But that doesn't apply to bad horror movies, does it? I mean, look at the Friday the 13th series. The 6th damn one was probably the best of the entire fucking series and the other sequels were gems in their own right. Armed with this knowledge, the review crew here at Night of the Creeps sat down to enjoy the second installment of Slumber Party Massacre. There was absolutely no doubt in my mind that the second installment in this series would be at least three stars just by virtue of the fact that it was following one of the best bad movies ever made in the original Slumber Party Massacre. Before Eagle Te proceeds to offer his humble opinion on the film, here is a brief plot summary: Courtney, the hot pants younger sister of the surviving new girl from the original that enjoyed strumming her hot bearded treasures to the latest issue of Playgirl (sorry for the obvious frustration, but its been two weeks since Eagle Te has had a chance to practice his Lotus punch on the heavy bag) and who made Eagle Te want to practice his forms in the nude for her amusement, is all grown up now but is troubled by horrible nightmares of her traumatic experience at the eternal slumber party a few years back. When her and her female rock band (a strange yet alluring combination of Bananarama and Tone Loc) decide to go to a condo and play nude Crocodile Mile with their boyfriends for the weekend, terror ensues again when they are systematically eliminated by a musically inclined killer!
Sounds like its worth a rent? WELL IT SURE AS HELL AIN'T!! This movie sucks such a big cock that it would put a number of donkey bobbing strippers in Tiajuana to shame!! The killer is without a doubt the most excruciating character I have ever watched in my years of bad movie experience. The motherfucker is dressed like some Fonz look alike in a gay techno club (not that Eagle Te visits such establishments...Hey, do you think I was just born with this long flowing white kung fu hairdo?) has a drill guitar that he kills people with, then plays a shitty tune and quips an equally painful one liner that will make you cringe harder than when your friends find your autographed John Tesh CD stashed away in the back of your closet! I would sooner volunteer to jack off a mule nude and barefoot in a pit of broken glass while William Shatner's music CD is blasted over some 200 inch speakers in a packed house of the 70,000 seat Georgia Dome then sit through this painful bastard again. IT IS SERIOUSLY THAT BAD!!! Its not that the kills and the teenage cast are bad...in many ways they are okay and there are a few truly funny and memorable scenes, but the killer takes all the promise of this movie and SHITS all over it! The killer is truly that bad and his full length song had me creating a noose out of dirtiest pair of BVDs before it was over with! Heed Te's advice...SKIP OVER THIS BASTARD!!! If you think you're strong enough to stomach it, go ahead and try it. BE WARNED, you will walk away from this feeling like you have just been violated by an angry Turkish construction crew who held you down while Ahmad proceeded to pound your anus with a jackhammer and didn't stop until his favorite episode of Dawson's Creek was over with! Don't laugh...it could happen to you...just ask El Santo!!! Eagle Te definitely does not approve!!!!!
Our Rating System
Mr. Paul: "With a name like Slumber Party Massacre it's gotta be good... bullshit! The driller killer/POISON lead singer sucked shit and Helen Chapel didn't even get naked! This film throughly embarasses its predocessor."
Z-Man: "The thoroughly embarassing 'Driller Killer' that stars as the 'villain' in this sub-zero shitfest deserves to be kicked in the nuts with his damn blue suede shoes. Slumber Party Massacre 2 is an absolute abomination- one that does not hesitate to take a red hot shit on the tombstone of its predecessor!"
Eagle Te: "FUCK THIS SHIT!!! Couple of genuinely funny scenes are simply ruined by the worst killer in movie history!! If you watch this, don't forget to wipe afterwards! "